End of the beginning. Retrying.

It's only one.
But its too big.
And it lasts too long.
I wonder and wonder.
I must have made many many little and some big mistakes.
I must have forgot many things.
Did i take things for granted?
Did i do worst than others?
Was i not so thankful ?
Is this really a big field with fertile soil to be harvested ?
Or is it a sign for the wandering souls?
Is this just another thing that will pass too?

December song playlist

"Not A Bad Thing - Justin Timberlake"

[Verse 1:]
Said all I want from you is to see you tomorrow
And every tomorrow, maybe you'll let me borrow your heart
And is it too much to ask for every Sunday
And while we're at it, throw in every other day to start

[Pre-Chorus:]
I know people make promises all the time
Then they turn right around and break them
When someone cuts your heart open with a knife, now you're bleeding
But I could be that guy to heal it over time
And I won't stop until you believe it
'Cause baby you're worth it

[Chorus:]
So don't act like it's a bad thing to fall in love with me
'Cause you might look around to find your dreams come true, with me
Spent all your time and your money just to find out that my love was free
So don't act like it's a bad thing to fall in love with me, me
It's not a bad thing to fall in love with me, me

[Verse 2:]
Now how about I'd be the last voice you hear tonight?
And every other night for the rest of the nights that there are
Every morning I just wanna see you staring back at me
'Cause I know that's a good place to start

Back to Pre-Chorus

Back to Chorus

[Bridge:]
No I won't fill your mind
With broken promises and wasted time
And if you fall, you'll always land right in these arms
These arms of mine

Back to chorus

=============================================

I'm now currently replaying this song.
I just realize that the 20/20 album have so many sweet songs.
Lagunya bikin galau, padahal gak ada yg digalauin coba. Hahahahahha
I guess that indicates a good song that can really move someone's heart.

My favorite playlist right now :
1. I bet - ciara
2. Sam Smith - Stay with me
3. Sam smith - money on my mind
4. Ed Sheeran - Dont
5. Stolen dance - milky chance
6. She came to give it to you - usher
7. Wildest dream - Taylor swift
8. No air - jordin sparks
9. Sky full of stars - coldplay, and last but not least
10. Keane - this is the last time

My Mom and My Dad

I remember the day,
The first day i entered junior high school.
My mom taught me how to go to school by bus,
And she was the one who accompanied me to the school front gate.
She was the one who made me an independent child.

Then i remember the day,
When suddenly rain poured heavily on that morning,
My father was the one who took me to school,
And he drove me to school front gate.
He was there before i already knew.

And i remember the day,
When my mom agreed me joining scout activity.
Probably my first time went somewhere with only my friends by bus.
She packed me lunch and gave me money.
She told me to be careful,
And not to come home too late.

But my father was the one,
Who wait all day,
That day i came home at 6 pm.
The first day i came home late by myself, after all i was only 11 years old.
He stood at the bus stop, waiting for me getting off from any bus.
I didnt know how long he's been there,
Waiting there with his umbrella and flashlight on his hand.

And there was the day,
My mom told me to learn how to the drive the car
She was so proud when i drove her to the market.
Tbh, i was just being brave, i messed up almost everytime i start the car.
And my father was against it at first,
He told me that i drove too fast
And too careless, telling me how to do this and that.
That was obvious, i was terrible.

My mom who doesnt worry too much,
But always warn to be careful,
She nags, complains, solves problems and supports me to do better things.
And my dad, who worries the most,
But not saying much.
He gives advices, solves problems, and keep me away from problems.

Too many things.
Too many things that i cant remember.
They might have different way showing their love
But i know that they will always love me,
And always be there for me.

So I pray to God..
God, bestow on the Your blessings
Just like they cherised me
When i was a little kid.
Amin

Carilah 10 perbedaan.

Horeee. Menelurkan dua buah karya gak jelas lagi.
Biarin aja geje yang penting ngurangin stres :p

BROMO sunrise

Hello again November.
Happy birthday to me.
And here i have a good story.
Probably the first and the last time for me waiting for sunrise from a peak of mountain.
I'm not good at hiking. Thats it :p
Okay.. my energy drain too fast nowadays. Awwwwww. Come on. Lol
I am still young. ROTFL

So here you go, a picture of US waiting for sunrise in Bromo Mountain.
And then we went to the Savana, rode a horse there, bought some souvenirs, and went back to Surabaya.

Can you see the 200 step stair up there?
No, i didnt climb it up. Sorry, i was saving my energy for the next day symposium *LIEEEEEE*




What you have to prepare when you go to Bromo Mountain :
- Jaket tebal, yes, Bromo dingin cuy, tp sekitar jam 10 pagi udara mulai hangat dan mulai panas kalo pake jaket, jadi didalam jaketnya cukup pake sweater. Waktu pergi kmrn saya pake baju kaos, sweater rajut, jaket dan syal. Bawahnya pake jeans aja masih oke
- Kaos kaki. Because you have to.
- Sepatu preferably anti air, and mind this : horse's poop literally everywhere, so...
- Jika anda mudah mabuk perjalanan, siapkan obat anti mabok karena perjalanan sangat melingkar lingkar dan jeepnya lumayan ngebut.. hihi

Coretan di awal November

Karena galau karena beberapa hal dan masalah lainnya *paansih* jadi agak stress dan gak jelas mau ngapain..
Kalo nulis lagi kayanya kok ngeluuuh terus 😂😂 jadi coba coba coret menyoret aja.. sekalian s-pen didayagunakan haha. Beneran doodling beginian ngasal banget. Pengen bikin yang rapih tapi gak bisa. Yaudahlah yaaa 😊

Bentar lagi 10 November. Umur bertambah lagi. Auuu au au au. Alhamdulillah masih diberi kesehatan dan umur untuk berkumpul dengan keluarga. Semoga segera menempuh hidup baru *ambigu* buakakakkakakakakaka.

Semoga November membawa kabar gembira bagi kita semua. AMIN 😊

Be a little bit more selfish

Because the time will come for you,
that no one can care for you and they have their own business

Because the time will come for you,
when you try to please everyone but you cant,
and not everyone can please you.. but yourself.

Because you've just realize that
you've been really nice for too long

Because when you're too late,
You'll sink by yourself

Because you're selfish enough to stand strong
And not letting yourself fall

Because you need to be just a little bit selfish to be happy

Because you can.

First three months

Life is a choice?

Life can be so bright,then can be so painful.
Life can be a little longer or can be so short the way you live.
Life offer you so many options, but then when none of them left, you foolishly realize that this life is not the only thing that you need to take care of.

As for me, i only have 1 option left for now.
Being strong.
Last 3 month was really torturing, i'm quite exhausted, and yeah im still trying to be a little arrogant on top of that.
The only pride that i have.
I just dont let them killing me.

You might not find traces of tears.
You didnt hear any screams.
But His creations is the best, alarm will stay being alarm.

God threw problems and has the reason for each of them.
To remind us of the right path.
To make us a better person.
To see if we'll stay walking in the right path.

God, let me pass this too.
Give me a lot more strength.
You are the only One from whom we seek help.
There's no power except by Your help.